The Cost of “I Don’t Know.”

Recently, I’ve had a series of conversations with friends who’ve pointed out that in certain situations I will respond, “I don’t know” to certain types of questions.

imgresWhile I was initially shocked by the importance of this observation, as it was simply an attempt to avoid conflict or disagreements, upon review it seems that by not fully voicing my thoughts and opinions on a subject I was not only doing a disservice to the relationship, but was also doing a disservice to myself. In not sharing my perspective, my way of seeing the world, I was preventing the other person from seeing from that vantage point, fully seeing me, and also fully coming to see themselves through the effects that my perspective may or may not have had on them. As you approach today’s series of relationships and conversations, I would like to invite you to think about the small ways in which you may attempt to avoid conflict through small omissions or white lies. When and where do you respond, “I don’t know.” Is this true? And if not, what are your reasons for doing so? What are the benefits and costs of not speaking your truth? Is the price worth it to you?